Cloud Hands

I know the Tai Chi form Cloud Hands describes the movement of the sun and moon throughout the cycle of a day; but, lately it has come to take on a new meaning for me.

I started working on the Cloud Hands portion of the Chen form a few weeks back. I had to concentrate on sinking my Qi and not injuring my knee. My arms noticeably grew stronger from slowing down the form and working it over and over to get the footwork figured out. Then, while untangling the dog's long line from the lilac while having a low blood sugar episode, I was reminded that I need to stay grounded and present all the time.  The dog twisted and lunged and I pulled muscles in my arm. It really hurt!

I immediately did some healing qigong; but, the swelling and bruising started anyway. Since I vowed to not let anything dissuade me from my Summer Solstice hide & form at Gold Cord Lake, I decided to continue working on my form and doing the Ba Duan Jin. IT HURT!

It hurt ALOT! But, I did a little every day. Sometimes I did only my right uninjured arm. Sometimes I just did foot work and thought about the arm movements. Then, it dawned on me to visualize moving clouds with my hands instead of water. I focused on soft movements and slowed down as much as I could. It seemed to help. Perhaps I will still be moving clouds up at Gold Cord Lake in a few weeks (or maybe snowflakes since there is still snow there); but, I am back on track and a wiser player by far.

Happy 2013 World Tai chi Qigong Day!

http://worldtaichiday.org/

This global celebration has become an annual event in my life. Today was the first time that there wasn't an organized event in Wasilla (that I know of). It was bittersweet, but, I celebrated anyway.

World Tai Chi & Qigong Day is one day when Taichi players feel connected and set aside our differences in form and technique to open our heart center to the treasure we have found.

In preparation for today, I decided to do a bit of practice last night. For me to continue a practice it has to be fun. I've really gotten into playing music and making practicing form into a dance. And, true to my nature, I've been more fascinated with progressing in choreography and philosophy of Chen form ala Master Jou & Shiva Wollering. I KNOW I KNOW - Qigong is good for me and it makes me feel so good; but, for some reason it has been taking a back seat. "I don't have time. I don't feel like it today. Tomorrow. Maybe later. It's so routine." In fact Qigong seems like calisthenics or drills. So prescribed and not much room for creativity. So, last night I buckled down and did the Qigong - Ba Dua Jin first. I even did some standing meditation (another thing I can put off without much prompting or feeling guilty)  My knee hurt, my left foot is swollen, my back was stiff, my hands were tight. I had a whole list of possible excuses but I pushed through in spite of it all.

WOW! All my questions about whether I should bother with Qigong daily or whether or not I should do it before or in lieu of form were answered. I felt so good. No pain in the knee, no pain in the foot, my back loosened up, and I think I'm starting to see better with my left eye.  I could breathe better and gained energy I sure didn't have when I began.

I'm sure if I'd apply this same dedication daily and increased my meditation time I would feel even better.  Why do I let ol Resistance win?

I read a book about learning to conquer Resistance and living the creative life. The author said that Resistance is Evil. There is nothing good to come from engaging Resistance and winning the battle won't make it go away. We must learn that Evil is a fact of physical life (what's the matter with you?) and part of that lovely cycle of life - Yin Yan - Tai Chi - Wan Wu...  So, I will not beat myself up over my negligence and laziness; but, i will embrace Qigong more fully.

When I awoke this morning, I heard the wind whipping and knew I couldn't do my Taiji outdoors. I decided to do some Qigong meditations and connect with those globally for a few hours. I am peaceful and happy.

Repulse the Monkey

100 Day Challenge 2013

A 100 day commitment is traditional - Here is a good explanation from Magic Tortoise and Spring Forest Qigong has 100 days of Qigong. In past yeasrs I have taken up various challenges. 2010 I dedicated myself to clearing - decluttering spiritual, emotional, and material. 2011 I wrote something everyday. 2012 was a renewal of writing morning pages ala Julia Cameron. This year had to be different. I am managing my diabetes and glaucoma without pharmaceuticals.  I have started a Nutrarian lifestyle and am healing regaining my strength to relocate and make some return back to myself. I know that I need to commit to Qigong and Taijiquan. My weekly or 3 times a week is good but daily would be better. Just meeting a challenge of doing it for 100 days was going to be too weak to inspire me. So, I made the 100 day commitment with goals in mind. Master Jou says we need goals both small and large. Before leaving Alaska I would like to hike one more times in the mountains I love. I used to hike all the time; but since 2000 and the deterioration of my health, knee, and interest I haven't been able to climb mountains.

Gold Cord Lake

There is a beautiful lake in Hatcher's Pass - Gold Cord Lake. It's remote, a reasonable hike, and I've never been there.  So, I am working to hike up to Gold Cord Lake on the Summer Solstice and perform as much of the Chen form as I can master by then. (more on Chen form later) I will record it on video and share the event with my friends and family. This inspires! When I don't want to I think about how beautiful it is and how I won't have this opportunity again in this lifetime (unless lightening strikes).

A 100 day challenge has many rewards unrelated to the actual challenge itself. I"m already realizing some of that. I started on February 10th - Chinese new year. We're in the year of the snake which is my youngest daughter's first 12 year return. 12 years ago I was so ill I couldn't walk to the end of my short driveway without being exhausted. I couldn't manage my life or health or even newborn daughter. I remember watching my neighbor walking the block one day and I was in tears. I didn't think I'd ever be able to go for a walk again. Now, I can stand on one leg and am getting close to doing a proper tornado kick. What a difference time makes.

Here is my teacher, Wendy playing Yang Style Tai Chi near this trail

Chop Wood, Carry Water

Here's  little long needed housekeeping and spring renewal. More of a mission statement for me so I can remind myself of my dedication to this blog.

I have now tied it to my LiveJournal because I'm lousy at private online journaling. I never get around to it unless I make it accessible. I prefer to use pen and paper for my personal journal. And, along with feeling some remorse for not using my LiveJournal as I'd like, I've also become aware of the general lack of access to blog posts of others "along the way" to learning Taijiquan, Qigong, and Mindfulness practice. I treasure the few posts I have found and have reblogged most to my Tumblr. I hope to share here my musings, breakthroughs, experiences, and mind chatter for others who also need to know they aren't alone with their new practice.

I will most likely revisit some of my older breakthroughs as well as share progress of my 100 day challenge for this Year of the Snake. Yeah, I tend to get long winded. Feel free to scan and click away because I am not going to even attempt censoring my style for this. There are a gazillion polished blogs with well researched, documented, cross linked posts out there. This isn't one of those.

This is going to be for me and those who have struggled with a leg cramp during balance training or complete confusion when learning form. It's for those who thought their head was going to explode during microcosmic orbit meditation and who giggled through the first several inner smile meditations. Really,   where is my spleen?

Master Jou says it is ultimately important to apply Taijiquan to daily life and vice versa. It is that seedling I tend here.